The best revenge is premature balding
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
