and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
