Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
