This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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