when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
i would one night stand the shit outta him
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
