hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
