i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize