how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ketchup is God's man juice
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
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