So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize
