Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
