I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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