I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize