names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
