Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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