He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
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Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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