I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Im part way to drunk.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
