Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
