at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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