ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
