Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
