What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize