Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
