You're my little dorito
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
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