if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Randomize
