Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
