"it" just moved
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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