We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize