Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
