Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
