u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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