There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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