so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I'm going to jail i love you
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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