So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
so let's talk penis.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
