Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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