Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
