Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
