Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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