I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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