Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
