At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
