finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize