they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Randomize