Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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