There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize