I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Randomize
