how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
