I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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