She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.