If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
