I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
