From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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